“He is with us, He is with always, always,” the chorus from Love and the Outcome’s song burned in my mind.
Yes, He is.
But oh, sometimes, it is so hard to wait on Him.
In a two-month time span this autumn, I watched all three of my children journey through life-threatening situations. All three. Each one had her own. How does a mother’s heart stand it?
Because she clings to the Father.
She knows God has each and every one.
But she’s still human and has her moments. I have those moments.
Watching the monitor in the ICU as we anxiously awaited blood tests results, confirming our little girl would live.
Desperately trying to figure out how to help another daughter find that right medication to fight a deadly illness.
Watching the internet and then my text messages as a horrifying fire ripped through California, and specifically threatened a college campus, a campus my daughter was holed up in the library for the night as the smoke threatened the air quality and the flames seared fear into the student’s hearts.
“He is with us, He is with us always, always…”
Yes God, even in this. I know You are in control.
But I don’t think my heart can take any more.
“Cast all you cares upon Him, for He cares for you.” I Peter 5:7 (HCSB) resonated in my mind, rang in my heart, and held my tears in check.
He cares.
He truly cares.
When we feel we are in the fire, when we can’t see through the flames, when the heat is just too much. When we are exhausted, overwhelmed, and just want to give in… He sees, He cares, and He is there.
He is not apathetic. He is not still. He is working behind the scenes.
How easily I forget that.
I want it fixed now!
Yet, He has a purpose in the wait.
But I don’t want to wait! I want my mother’s heart relieved that my girl is safe.
Yet, she is His too.
He’s holding her. He’s caring for her. He’s protecting her, in ways I would want to but simply can’t, because I am human.
So, I must give it to Him.
Maybe, like me, you struggle with that sometimes. Does anyone else find it rather simple to let the “little stuff” up to God, but the hard things, the heart-wrenching things, the horrifying things… He cares about that stuff too.
And, unlike you and me, He’s God and can deal with all the hard stuff, can cure the heart-wrenching scenarios, and halt the horrifying situations. And then, He can provide all the healing that must come after.
How can I learn to give Him all my cares?
When the fear threatens my peace, when anxiety tries to rule my actions, and when hating a situation hardens my heart, He cares for me. He loves me.
Just as I want to protect and hold and love my child, He wants to protect my heart, hold me through the trial and love me every moment.
He is how we get through those terrifying times, when we wonder how we might make it to the next day. He provides that peace that passes understanding. He knows how we will make it through. He knows how He will use this time to further us in our faith.
He knows the why, the reason He allowed it. And, He knows how He plans to redeem it.
I must trust. I must trust Him. Even when it’s hard. Because He is with us. Always. And, He cares.
Prayer: Lord, please help me carry all my cares to You. You can handle even the “big giants” on my heart. Help me to trust You. When I want to jump in and do something, anything, help me to pray and ask You to do what only You can do. Thank You that You care and You promise to handle everything. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Praying shalom for you, dear Stefanie!
Thank you; He has us!