He roused himself, still groggy from the unplanned afternoon nap. His half-open eyes registered the dark, glass bottle.
Somewhere, through the hazy stupor, a rising panic punctured his heart.
He’d broken his promise.
Again.
He guiltily glanced at the coffee table. Yep, his worn, leather-bound Bible lay right there in plain sight.
Why hadn’t he seen it so easily a few hours ago when stress had nearly choked him?
In that moment, he’d only had eyes for one thing: the bottle.
Sighing,he pushed his empty hand through his greasy hair, as disgust coursed through him, diving into the dark secrets of his soul.
The other hand tightened around the bottle.
Shame.
Frustration.
Grief.
The emotions simultaneously surged through him.
He intentionally looked back to the Bible. He knew what it said.
He knew it was true.
He knew God loved him.
He also knew his repeated addiction drove a wedge larger than a mountain between himself and his heavenly Father.
It also drove a wedge between himself and his family.
And, between who he was and who he wanted to be.
“Stop fighting and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10 HCSB
Stop waging war with yourself.
Know God is Lord over all, even this mess.
Stop struggling.
Let up.
Relax.
Experience peace.
Peace comes when we acknowledge God is lord over all.
Allow His peace, which passes understanding, to flood your very soul.
Then, determine how to best deal with the addiction at hand.
- Get support. Satan loves to shame us with secrets. Break his bond by telling a trusted group of people.
- Turn to God every time. Make consulting with Him that knee-jerk response to triggers.
- Know God loves me in spite of the struggle.
Satan knows my name, but calls me by my sin.
Jesus knows my sin but chooses to call me by my name.
Jesus wants to rescue His children from the clutches of addiction. He wants to guide them back to God.
But He doesn’t force His way.
He awaits an invitation.
If you struggle with addiction, know your heavenly Father doesn’t see you or call you by the addiction. In His eyes, you are not called an alcoholic, a drug abuser, or a porn addict.
He sees you as His child struggling with addiction.
Talk to Him.
Ask for forgiveness. And then, ask for the strength to do what’s right.
Get help. It may be the hardest thing you’ve ever done, but a year from now you’ll be so glad you did.
Father God,
You know. You see. And yet, You still love.
You know everything about me and still choose to call me by my name. God, please strengthen your struggling sons and daughters. May we come honestly and humbly before You. May we experience You love and forgiveness. May we boldly ask for help and bring the addiction into light.
Thank you for loving so much that You call me by name. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
“Jesus knows my sin but chooses to call me by my name.” Beautifully written. Thank you for sharing. God bless!